You didn’t come back..
I remember the look upon your face
when you first left.
A smile was painted
but loneliness was etched in your heart.
Left behind your promises
with overflowing dreams and hopes.
Sailed miles away
in search of a brighter sun.
Months drifted to years
not having you around.
Emptiness came to pass
yet you came back home.
Once more you left
this time with words left unsaid.
Too bad the evil waves took you
so you didn’t come back home.
~ SheryL♥ ~
This isn’t the first poem I’ve written for my wonderful father. It’s never easy for me to put into pen what my heart wants to tell him every time. The first time I tried was so hard that I couldn’t help but shed tears. Yet, I scraped myself and courage together and continued the poem and submitted it to my university publication (the Education Department). To gain sympathy and popularity wasn’t my intention. It was for me to finally tell him the words I wanted him to hear before he left.
This time was written out of missing him so much. My father left for us to have food to eat, a place to call home, clothes to make us comfortable, and good education. Part of my teenage was me growing up with only a responsible mother by my side. I always used to envy the other teens who have both parents at home. Along the way, I learned not to. Papa didn’t want it but he had to. If it wasn’t for his love for his family, he could’ve just let us die of hunger and cold.
Years had passed and I got used to him being away from us. Everything was fine. Except for one horrible day.
It was on a Sunday morning in June 2008. The day my dad would finally come back home. I was in a deep sleep when I suddenly heard a loud knock on the door and a hysterical voice. It was my father’s aunt. She came with the most devastating news in my entire life. “The ship! The ship! On the radio…..the ship! He was there! The ship.. capsized!”
Those were her broken words I barely understood as if I was only dreaming. The minute I heard the word “capsized”, I woke fully and could speak nothing but “Papa”. I then remember I had a dream the night before that day. I saw him wafting over a wood in a deep blue sea. This couldn’t be real! I was only 17 and didn’t know what to do. I had high hopes that he survived and see him coming back home. The whole country mourned with the families of the victims. But I was so young that I could only hate them. I even didn’t know who to hate. It came to a point when I got mad at God and asked Him why he would let it happen that way. Nothing worse than an unforeseen loss of a beloved.
Up until now, he never came home. This tragedy has taught me something that I’ll live by all the days of my life. Tomorrow is never promised so make your love ones feel how much they mean to you. In any way that makes them happy. Life in this world is nothing but short. A cliche but definitely true. Death is inevitable and no, it doesn’t let you bid farewell.